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MADMAX
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Post by MADMAX » Wed Apr 23, 2008 3:59 am

did you notice the address ( Fullerton, Calif., The Orange County (Calif.) )
thats very very close to Friendly_Fire's house, and come to think of it F_F has been very quiet lately here on the forum and the server's, Maybe he is just 2 tired to play and come to the forum, or he could have found something new to occupy himself :lol: :P :P :P :P :lol:
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Post by Friendly_Fire » Wed Apr 23, 2008 9:38 am

MADMAX wrote:did you notice the address ( Fullerton, Calif., The Orange County (Calif.) )
thats very very close to Friendly_Fire's house, and come to think of it F_F has been very quiet lately here on the forum and the server's, Maybe he is just 2 tired to play and come to the forum, or he could have found something new to occupy himself :lol: :P :P :P :P :lol:


F-F:

*chin on chest*

*z-z--zzz*

*head pops up*

"Huh? WHa?"

*head drops forward*

*z-z-z-zzz*




:drool:


p.s. By the way, Fullerton is down in Orange County, near Los Angeles, where items like the above are commonplace.
I live in the Bay area, where everything's wholesome.

:deg:
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Post by Xpress » Wed Apr 23, 2008 10:01 am

Friendly_Fire wrote:
F-F:

*chin on chest*

*z-z--zzz*

*head pops up*

"Huh? WHa?"

*head drops forward*

*z-z-z-zzz*




:drool:


p.s. By the way, Fullerton is down in Orange County, near Los Angeles, where items like the above are commonplace.
I live in the Bay area, where everything's hole some.

:deg:


Fixed. :twisted:
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Post by Archie_Klumper » Wed Apr 23, 2008 11:42 am

Image ***sigh*** Make up your minds :roll:

World might be heading towards Ice Age

Economic Times
Wednesday, April 23, 2008

CANBERRA: Scientists have warned that the world might once again be heading towards an Ice Age, with global warming approaching a possible end.

Evidence in support of this theory has come from pictures obtained from the US Solar and Heliospheric Observatory, which showed no spots on the sun, thus determining that sunspot activity has not resumed after hitting an 11-year low in March last year.

A sunspot is a region on the sun that is cooler than the rest and appears dark.

Some scientists believe a strong solar magnetic field, when there is plenty of sunspot activity, protects the earth from cosmic rays, cutting cloud formation, but that when the field is weak - during low sunspot activity - the rays can penetrate into the lower atmosphere and cloud cover increases, cooling the surface.

According to Australian astronaut and geophysicist Phil Chapman, this might have caused the world to cool quickly between January last year and January this year, by about 0.7C.

"This is the fastest temperature change in the instrumental record, and it puts us back to where we were in 1930," said Dr Chapman.

"If the temperature does not soon recover, we will have to conclude that global warming is over," he added.

Dr Chapman has proposed preventive, or delaying, moves to slow the cooling, such as bulldozing Siberian and Canadian snow to make it dirty and less reflective.

"My guess is that the odds are now at least 50:50 that we will see significant cooling rather than warming in coming decades," he said.

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Post by He||raZ'r » Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:01 pm

Friendly_Fire wrote: I live in the Bay area, where everything's wholesome. :deg:


San Francisco's tenderloin area is wholesome? Polk St wholesome?
Define wholesome for me? :D
..Its merely a couple of clicks and BLAM , I'm instant smoke.

Another Silver Silver Classic Quote

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Post by Renegadex » Wed Apr 23, 2008 6:24 pm

That solar cycle junk sounds like complete crap.

1) The sun undergoes a cycle of high activity and low activity every 15 years. We don't have ice ages that frequently, do we?
2) Periods of high solar activity have a couple of interesting effects, but none are strong enough to cause cooling:
a) Warping of the earth's magnetic field. It tends to bulge away from incoming solar ejecta, but doesn't collapse.
b) Expansion of the earth's atmosphere. High solar activity actually makes our atmosphere EXPAND. Satellite controllers are keenly aware of this, as en expanding atmosphere puts AIR up where it usually ain't, and affects low-orbit satellites! That MIGHT cause cooling, but it's not enough (short-term and not all that high).
3) The low-activity timeframe is not a matter of months. It takes a while for the sun to "ramp up" again. During this time, the heat output of the Sun really doesn't change. Yeesh.

I dunno, but I don't think the evidence fits the facts, just yet. We just don't have a long enough period of climate change data to reach a definitive conclusion on the issue.

Sure, Gore has his CO2 data to throw around, but he's missing a few key elements: external confirming data (other than his single source) and CAUSALITY.

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Post by Archie_Klumper » Thu Apr 24, 2008 8:19 am

Image WTF is going on in the world???

from the Wall Street Journal

Load Up the Pantry
April 21, 2008 6:47 p.m.

I don't want to alarm anybody, but maybe it's time for Americans to start stockpiling food.

No, this is not a drill.

You've seen the TV footage of food riots in parts of the developing world. Yes, they're a long way away from the U.S. But most foodstuffs operate in a global market. When the cost of wheat soars in Asia, it will do the same here.

Reality: Food prices are already rising here much faster than the returns you are likely to get from keeping your money in a bank or money-market fund. And there are very good reasons to believe prices on the shelves are about to start rising a lot faster.

"Load up the pantry," says Manu Daftary, one of Wall Street's top investors and the manager of the Quaker Strategic Growth mutual fund. "I think prices are going higher. People are too complacent. They think it isn't going to happen here. But I don't know how the food companies can absorb higher costs." (Full disclosure: I am an investor in Quaker Strategic)

Stocking up on food may not replace your long-term investments, but it may make a sensible home for some of your shorter-term cash. Do the math. If you keep your standby cash in a money-market fund you'll be lucky to get a 2.5% interest rate. Even the best one-year certificate of deposit you can find is only going to pay you about 4.1%, according to Bankrate.com. And those yields are before tax.

Meanwhile the most recent government data shows food inflation for the average American household is now running at 4.5% a year.

And some prices are rising even more quickly. The latest data show cereal prices rising by more than 8% a year. Both flour and rice are up more than 13%. Milk, cheese, bananas and even peanut butter: They're all up by more than 10%. Eggs have rocketed up 30% in a year. Ground beef prices are up 4.8% and chicken by 5.4%.

These are trends that have been in place for some time.

And if you are hoping they will pass, here's the bad news: They may actually accelerate.

The reason? The prices of many underlying raw materials have risen much more quickly still. Wheat prices, for example, have roughly tripled in the past three years.

Sooner or later, the food companies are going to have to pass those costs on. Kraft saw its raw material costs soar by about $1.25 billion last year, squeezing profit margins. The company recently warned that higher prices are here to stay. Last month the chief executive of General Mills, Kendall Powell, made a similar point.

The main reason for rising prices, of course, is the surge in demand from China and India. Hundreds of millions of people are joining the middle class each year, and that means they want to eat more and better food.

A secondary reason has been the growing demand for ethanol as a fuel additive. That's soaking up some of the corn supply.

You can't easily stock up on perishables like eggs or milk. But other products will keep. Among them: Dried pasta, rice, cereals, and cans of everything from tuna fish to fruit and vegetables. The kicker: You should also save money by buying them in bulk.

If this seems a stretch, ponder this: The emerging bull market in agricultural products is following in the footsteps of oil. A few years ago, many Americans hoped $2 gas was a temporary spike. Now it's the rosy memory of a bygone age.

The good news is that it's easier to store Cap'n Crunch or cans of Starkist in your home than it is to store lots of gasoline. Safer, too.

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Post by Friendly_Fire » Thu Apr 24, 2008 11:43 pm

Xpress caught my sarcasm and corrected my spelling.

:lol:
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Post by MADMAX » Fri Apr 25, 2008 4:21 am

The History Of Mankind Revealed

DNA Study Finds Drought Nearly Killed All Humans
Genetic Research Reveals History Of Mankind
Human beings may have had a brush with extinction 70,000 years ago, an extensive genetic study suggests.

The human population at that time was reduced to small isolated groups in Africa, apparently because of drought, according to an analysis released Thursday.

The report notes that a separate study by researchers at Stanford University estimated the number of early humans may have shrunk as low as 2,000 before numbers began to expand again in the early Stone Age.

"This study illustrates the extraordinary power of genetics to reveal insights into some of the key events in our species' history," Spencer Wells, National Geographic Society explorer in residence, said in a statement. "Tiny bands of early humans, forced apart by harsh environmental conditions, coming back from the brink to reunite and populate the world. Truly an epic drama, written in our DNA."

Wells is director of the Genographic Project, launched in 2005 to study anthropology using genetics. The report was published in the American Journal of Human Genetics.

Previous studies using mitochondrial DNA - which is passed down through mothers - have traced modern humans to a single "mitochondrial Eve," who lived in Africa about 200,000 years ago.

The migrations of humans out of Africa to populate the rest of the world appear to have begun about 60,000 years ago, but little has been known about humans between Eve and that dispersal.

The new study, part of a five-year project, looks at the mitochondrial DNA of the Khoi and San people in South Africa which appear to have diverged from other people between 90,000 and 150,000 years ago.

The researchers led by Doron Behar of Rambam Medical Center in Haifa, Israel and Saharon Rosset of IBM T.J. Watson Research Center in Yorktown Heights, N.Y., and Tel Aviv University concluded that humans separated into small populations prior to the Stone Age, when they came back together and began to increase in numbers and spread to other areas.

Eastern Africa experienced a series of severe droughts between 135,000 and 90,000 years ago and the researchers said this climatological shift may have contributed to the population changes, dividing into small, isolated groups which developed independently.

Paleontologist Meave Leakey, a Genographic adviser, commented: "Who would have thought that as recently as 70,000 years ago, extremes of climate had reduced our population to such small numbers that we were on the very edge of extinction."

Today more than 6.6 billion people inhabit the globe, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.

The research was funded by the National Geographic Society, IBM, the Waitt Family Foundation, the Seaver Family Foundation, Family Tree DNA and Arizona Research Labs.

Arachnophobia At Aussie Hospital

SYDNEY, Australia - A tiny Australian hospital is closing temporarily because of an infestation of poisonous spider.

The Baralaba Multi Purpose Health Service will close for 24 hours starting Thursday morning so officials can fumigate the building to get rid of redback spiders that have been found in large numbers in the main part of the hospital.

Three or four patients will need to be moved to another hospital while the building is closed, according to a statement from Queensland state health officials.

Redback spiders, common throughout most of the country, have a painful bite and a toxic venom, although an anti-venom is available.

The statement said warm weather had caused more redback spider eggs to hatch than usual.

"We believe the best way to deal with them, and the safest option for staff and patients, is to have the whole building fumigated so both the spiders and their eggs are killed," Ellen Palmer, rural director of nursing, said in the statement Wednesday.

i was bitten by a redback spider at a BBQ when i was 18, i was brought to hospital. i was very sick for 3 days, every joint in my body ached and had a fever. these spiders can kill young children and old people. they are nasty little bastards, and Duesy can back me up on that ....
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Post by Duesy » Fri Apr 25, 2008 10:04 am

archie.. it's funny you should post that article.. I saw something on the news about food prices about to soar.. .
and they were going into the economy a bit..


a bit scary really
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Post by Archie_Klumper » Fri Apr 25, 2008 10:25 am

Heh, yeah... I guess we're going to start some bread lines soon. :?

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Post by Duesy » Fri Apr 25, 2008 10:30 am

Archie_Klumper wrote:Heh, yeah... I guess we're going to start some bread lines soon. :?
i have a bread maker.. so I can bake haley's bread for you all!
sell it at a reasonable price.. about $20 a loaf! (hehe)
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Post by Renegadex » Sat Apr 26, 2008 11:03 pm

* NEWS FLASH *

Prices are going up!



...oh, wait, scratch the "flash", this is and will always be "old" news. Prices are always going up.

The REAL issue is that ACTUAL WAGES are not pacing with prices. Add inflation of the $US and you get...seemingly quickly rising prices.

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Post by MADMAX » Sun Apr 27, 2008 6:07 am

Today Is: World Penguin Day

What it is: World Penguin Day is a day to learn about penguins. The day was created to recognize the day that penguins begin their migration northward. They have a long walk ahead.

What To Do: Watch "March Of The Penguins" or "Farce Of The Penguins" (if you like Bob Saget. If you are a hardcore penguin supporter, dress up in a tuxedo and walk about 100 miles.


Man mowing his lawn discovers 7-10 foot hole

CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa - A Cedar Rapids man mowing his lawn has stumbled into a big hole — but the origin is a mystery. Rick Thompson discovered the hole on Wednesday. He says the grass seemed a little soft in that spot, and he blamed it on the rain. Then his leg sank up to his calf. He grabbed the lawn mower to stop himself from sinking any more.

Thompson started digging around the hole, which turned out to be 7-10 feet deep, with water and rusty pipes in the bottom.

Thompson's wife, Sharon, called the city, but even with expert help, no one could solve the mystery. She says some think it could be a well or an old septic tank.

The Thompsons have blocked off the area until they can hire someone to remove the pipes and fill up the hole. :shock:

Red Sox 'Curse' Jersey Fetches $175,100 On eBay

The online auction of the tattered David Ortiz jersey that was buried in the new Yankee Stadium has ended.

The final bid was $175,100 from "2004carman." The winner has not been identified yet.

The auction began last Thursday on eBay and ended at 12:30 p.m. Thursday. The starting bid was $500.

All proceeds will go to the Jimmy Fund, the children's cancer charity affiliated with Boston's Dana-Farber Cancer Institute.

Construction worker and Red Sox fan Gino Castignoli buried the shirt under two feet of cement during the construction of the new stadium hoping to curse the Yankees. When the Yankees found out about it, they dug it up earlier this month.

Yankee President Randy Levine had the shirt cleaned up and sent to the Jimmy Fund.

The Yankees said it cost about $30,000 to dig up the jersey.

(© 2008 CBS Broadcasting Inc. All Rights Reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed. The Associated Press contributed to this report.)
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Post by MADMAX » Wed Apr 30, 2008 10:38 am

Iranian Official Warns Against Importing Barbies

A top Iranian judiciary official has warned against the "destructive" cultural and social consequences of importing Barbie dolls and other Western toys.

Prosecutor General Ghorban Ali Dori Najafabadi said in an official letter to Vice President Parviz Davoudi that the Western toys was a "danger" that needed to be stopped.

Iranian markets have been inundated with smuggled Western toys in recent years partly due to a dramatic rise in purchasing power as a result of huge increase in oil revenues.

In Monday's letter, Najafabadi called for a crackdown on the smuggling of these toys which threatened Iranian culture.

Calif. Sex Club Selling Used Beds, Furniture

LOS ANGELES (CBS) ― A sex club in Orange County is selling its used beds, foam mattresses and purple-felt wall coverings, it was reported Sunday.

Club Amnesty is moving and its furniture is now up for sale on Craigslist, the Orange County Register reported.

The club, also known as C.W. Studios, was a place for married and unmarried pairs to have intimate parties with other couples. It had been cited for fire and building code violations, as well as operating without a proper business license.

Among items being offered is a 600-pound icemaker, 26 foam mattresses of various sizes, and a steel-framed bed with headboard lights.

:P
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Post by Xpress » Wed Apr 30, 2008 2:34 pm

Dallas man freed by DNA testing after 27 years in prison


A judge in Dallas today freed a man who served 27 years in prison for the slaying of his girlfriend -- since DNA evidence has cleared him.

The case of James Lee Woodard still must be formalized by an appeals court or a pardon from Governor Rick Perry. Woodard, jailed since New Year's Day 1981 after his girlfriend was raped and murdered, became the 18th person in Dallas County to have his conviction cast aside.

Woodard was sentenced to life in prison for the murder of a 21-year-old Dallas woman found sexually assaulted and strangled near the banks of the Trinity River.

The victim was Beverly Ann Jones.

Woodard was convicted primarily on the basis of testimony from two eyewitnesses. Officials say one has since recanted and the accuracy of the other has been questioned.
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Post by Renegadex » Wed Apr 30, 2008 11:30 pm

News Flash

Oil slick on ocean.

Film at 11.


(get it?) :roll:

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Post by Friendly_Fire » Thu May 01, 2008 1:07 am

Ouch, that was actually painful!

:doh:
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Re: IN THE NEWS

Post by Archie_Klumper » Thu May 01, 2008 7:19 am

MADMAX wrote:Among items being offered is a 600-pound icemaker, 26 foam mattresses of various sizes, and a steel-framed bed with headboard lights.

:P


Headboard lights? What? No mirrors?

And what about the swings... I could use a new one. We broke our last one. :eyebrow:

I need some new hardware too Image

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Post by Archie_Klumper » Thu May 01, 2008 1:12 pm

Police: Woman believed to be 'D.C. madam' kills herself

TARPON SPRINGS, Fla. - Police say a woman they believe to be convicted Washington escort service operator Deborah Jeane Palfrey has committed suicide.
Police in Tarpon Springs, Florida say the body was found in a shed near Palfrey's mother's home Thursday morning. There was a suicide note, but police did not disclose its contents.

Palfrey was convicted April 15 by a federal jury of running a prostitution service that catered to members of Washington's political elite.

She had denied her escort service engaged in prostitution, saying that if any of the women engaged in sex acts for money, they did so without her knowledge.


:lol: I'm sure it was "suicide" Image

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Post by BAR|BeerThePenguin » Thu May 01, 2008 1:36 pm

Renegadex wrote:News Flash

Oil slick on ocean.

Film at 11.


(get it?) :roll:

Friendly_Fire wrote:Ouch, that was actually painful!

:doh:


News Flash

Time rolls back one hour today

Film at 10
"It is better to keep your mouth shut and let people think you are
a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt." -- Mark Twain
" " -- Charlie Chaplin
" " -- Harpo Marx
" " -- Marcel Marceau

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Post by Renegadex » Thu May 01, 2008 4:12 pm

Ha, ha, hahaha.

Not so funny true, work-related story: an HP server (HP-UX) upgrade this weekend somehow set the clock ahead to the year 2020. Beware processor/memory upgrades...or HP techs. Beats me which it was, as I'm not an infrastructure geek.

...now what was it I was saying about Unix servers? Whoops... ;)

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Post by MADMAX » Tue May 06, 2008 9:53 am

Sacramento man arrested after police find 300 dead cats

SACRAMENTO, Calif. (AP) - Police say they have discovered 300 dead cats stuffed into freezers at a man's Sacramento home.

Animal control officers also removed 30 live cats from 47-year-old Michael Louis Vondueren's home over the weekend.

Vondueren was arrested on suspicion of possessing an automatic weapon and obstructing police officers. Animal control officers also are considering issuing citations.

Authorities say three freezers were crammed with dead cats and the house was littered with cat feces. Police say Vondueren's 81-year-old mother also was living at the house.

Denver Man Wants City Prepared For Space Aliens

DENVER, Co. (AP) ― A Denver man wants the city to be prepared for possible space aliens and he's drafted a proposal that would create a commission to deal with the matter.

The city will hold a "review and comment" meeting next Thursday on Jeff Peckman's proposed ballot initiative to create an 18-member ET commission. Peckman says the Extraterrestrial Affairs Commission would form a strategy "dealing with issues related to the presence of extraterrestrial beings on Earth."

Denver assistant City Attorney David Broadwell says he doesn't know what city officials will ask Peckman during the hearing.

The 54-year-old needs 4,000 signatures to get the proposal on the ballot.

Peckman sponsored a 2003 initiative that would require the city to implement stress-reduction techniques. That idea didn't garner enough support from voters.
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Re: IN THE NEWS

Post by Archie_Klumper » Tue May 06, 2008 10:09 am

MADMAX wrote:Denver Man Wants City Prepared For Space Aliens


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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gf19L6DjnTQ

I like the 'rhianna' comment someone left :lol:

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Post by Archie_Klumper » Tue May 06, 2008 11:05 am

What? Doesn't everyone perform foreplay on their wedding night this way? ImageImageImage

Just horsing around, brawling newlyweds say
Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Image
David and Christa Wielechowski hold hands during a news conference yesterday at WPXI-TV's studios.

They described it as drunken horseplay from a newlywed couple with a penchant for slapstick antics.

The bride who was jailed along with her groom after a wedding night brawl said yesterday the melee started when she stuck out her rear end for her husband to kiss during a boisterous argument in a hotel hallway. Instead, the intoxicated groom tapped her backside with his foot, the inebriated bride stepped forward onto her giant wedding gown and fell flat on her face. The groom then dropped four six-packs of bottled beer to the floor.

Hotel guests from a neighboring room thought her husband, David M. Wielechowski, had hurt her and ran to her aid, Christa M. Wielechowski said in the couple's first public statement since they were jailed April 27 on assault, disorderly conduct, public drunkenness and criminal mischief charges. She told them she was fine and told them to leave her alone.

The couple and the unknown guests exchanged profanities, and then a man punched her husband in the face, sparking a violent struggle of stomping, kicking, biting, choking and dragging with four to five attackers that ended in the lobby of the Holiday Inn on McKnight Road in Ross.

When questioned about the couple's version of events, Ross police officials said several witnesses corroborated their initial account, that the groom karate-kicked the bride to the floor and a pair of good Samaritans came to her rescue.

"We're not saying we know they're lying. What these people perceived was that she was in distress," said Sgt. William Barrett of the Ross police.

"Sometimes we have to apply some common sense. Why would [the guests] attack these people? I think they were trying to help a woman who was struck. It wasn't like they were in an alley and they ran into some thugs. They were in a nice hotel with decent, upstanding people," he said.

He said officers did not interview the newlyweds at the scene because they were drunk and "they couldn't get much that made sense out of them."

The Wielechowskis said yesterday they had yet to be interviewed, to which Sgt. Barrett later responded, "If they want to talk we're open 24 hours a day."

Mrs. Wielechowski, 25, who patted her husband's arm and gripped his hand during a media interview at WPXI-TV, said she would not tolerate physical abuse from her husband.

"I would not stand for that," she said. "If he had ever laid his hands on me, I would not be sitting here at this moment."

She works as an assistant at his dental practice, which he has not returned to since the incident.

"I'm a very gentle person," said Dr. Wielechowski, 32, who had the remnants of a black eye, a bruised eyeball and was wearing a cast on the ankle he sprained in the fight. He apologized to his family, friends and patients for "the very unfortunate incident" that turned his wedding night upside down.

Mrs. Wielechowski said her 4-year-old son knows nothing about the widely publicized incident. The boy returned to school after the boy's father confirmed that -- despite a rumor -- parents had not circulated a petition complaining about negative impact the brawl might have on classmates.

The couple's preliminary hearing is set for May 28 before District Judge Richard G. Opiela in West View.

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Post by Renegadex » Wed May 07, 2008 8:34 pm

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Post by MADMAX » Thu May 08, 2008 3:56 am

Some object to nude festival in Italy

AGRIGENTO, Italy, May 7 (UPI) -- Some residents of the Agrigento area on the Italian island of Sicily have objected to an upcoming naturist festival at Capo Bianco beach.

The residents, as well as members of the Catholic Church, claim the May 23-25 Capo Bianco festival would be an illegal use of the beach for nude sunbathing, The Times of London reported Wednesday.

Italian law forbids nude sunbathing, but exceptions are made for beaches where local councils approve the practice and the areas are overseen by naturist associations.

Mayor Cosimo Piro of Cattolica Eraclea, the nearest village to the beach, issued a recent regulation allowing "free use of Capo Bianco by lovers of nude sunbathing." The mayor, a member of the Christian Democratic party, said the practice would help the beach draw tourists.

However, some have argued the mayor's regulation is not legally binding.

"The beach belongs to the state, not to the local council," said Father Giuseppe Miliziano, a local priest. "If the state decided to allow people to take their clothes off, there is not much I could do about it. But as far as I am aware no such authorization has been issued."

video Shows 2-Year Old Being Taught To Smoke Pot
Wisconsin Mother Now Enrolled In Parenting Classes


MENOMONEE FALLS, Wis. (CBS) ― A Wisconsin mother has turned her life around nearly 7 months after being arrested for giving her young son marijuana, CBS station WFOR-TV in Miami reports.

On a cell phone video, recently released by Menomonee Falls police, Krystle Weber's 2-year old son can be seen smoking a marijuana joint, urged on by two of Weber's friends.

On the tape you can hear Weber say "I swear to God, I better not get in trouble for this."

They did. Weber and her two friends, Sean Held and Dane Ashley, were all charged with giving marijuana to the boy. All pleaded guilty to the charge.

Now, 7 months later, Weber's attorney say she's turned her life around; she's gainfully employed and has been doing everything in her power to better her life and the life of her son. Weber is taking parenting classes and the court has allowed her to retain custody of the boy.

http://www.davesdaily.com/out.php?id=38 ... 18258.html
:? :? :? :? :? :? :? :? :? :? :? :evil:
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Post by Archie_Klumper » Thu May 08, 2008 1:16 pm

Square Watermelons...

Japan corners the market on square fruit

ImageImageImage

Farmers in the southern Japanese town of Zentsuji have figured out how to grow their watermelons so they turn out square.

It's not a fad. The technique actually has practical applications. "The reason they're doing this in Japan is because of lack of space," said Samantha Winters of the National Watermelon Promotion Board in Orlando, Florida.

A fat, round watermelon can take up a lot of room in a refrigerator, and the usually round fruit often sits awkwardly on refrigerator shelves.

But clever Japanese farmers have solved this dilemma by forcing their watermelons to grow into a square shape. Farmers insert the melons into square, tempered glass cases while the fruit is still growing on the vine.

The square boxes are the exact dimensions of Japanese refrigerators, allowing full-grown watermelons to fit conveniently and precisely onto refrigerator shelves.

But cubic fruit comes with a caveat: Each square watermelon costs 10,000 yen, the equivalent of about $82. Regular watermelons in Japan cost from $15 to $25 each.

At $82 apiece, Winters said she didn't know if there would be a market for square-grown watermelons in the United States.

"I think that's a pretty expensive watermelon," she said. "Maybe they give them as gifts. Maybe it says something for the gift-fruit market, perhaps."

But Winters also said that there does appear to be a growing U.S. market for watermelon that is more refrigerator-friendly. She said the industry is hearing from consumers that size matters.

"Our growers grow round, seedless melons in various sizes," she said. "And that's one reason why we grow the smaller watermelons ... so they'll fit into a refrigerator."

Winters added that so-called fresh-cut watermelon is widely available at U.S. groceries, another possible solution to a crisis created by oversized melons.

A recipe on the board's website calls for half-inch watermelon squares for use in martinis.

"You can find two-inch cubes" in groceries, Winters said. "They have watermelon that's cut in quarters and halves. And you can find clamshell containers with fresh-cut watermelon in there as well." Watermelon also can be pureed and poured into ice-cube trays for freezing.

So it seems U.S. watermelon lovers will have to settle for fresh-cut for now, and the $82, square watermelon won't be showing up at American groceries anytime soon.

$82 for watermelon!!! Image

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Post by MADMAX » Sun May 11, 2008 4:17 am

$82 for a watermelon omg they are taking the piss. :shock: :shock: :shock:


Ancient Torture Devices You Wouldn't Want To Find Yourself In

For all you wannabe dictators, a list of ancient torture and execution devices that you would not want to find yourself in.

Brazen Bull - Designed in Ancient Greece, this device was a hollow bull made entirely of brass. Criminals were sealed inside. The bull was then heated up over a fire. The conductive metal would literally roast the victim alive. As if that weren't enough, a series of valves in the bull's snout would muffle the screams of the victim, creating a sound like an angry bull.

Crocodile Shears - A medieval torture device that consisted of two blades. When clamped together, the blades formed a tube. Inside the tube were several sharp spikes. The crocodile shears were clamped down on an an erect penis and after enough force was exerted, the penis was torn from the body. Reserved for those who attempted to assasinate members of the royal family.

Instep Borer - A device of German engineering, that was essentially a metal boot that was worn by the victim. A crank on the boot dug a blade into the victim's instep.

Iron Maiden - An awesome metal band that when listened to would literally "rock your socks off". Not exactly a good torture, but the cause of many lost socks.

Scavenger's Daughter - Using the opposite principle of the boring-old-stretching rack, this device compressed the victim. Shaped like an "A" the victim was strapped to the device and the head was swung down to the knees causing blood to pour out of the ears and nose.

Shrew's Fiddle - Used against woman caught nagging and bickering. This version of a yoke, strapped around the woman's neck, the hands both locked in in front of her face. Primarily used to parade the woman throughout town.

Spanish Tickler - Not to be confused with the French Tickler, this claw-like device strapped to the torturer's hand and tore strips of flesh from the victim. Vega from Street Fighter wore a version of the Spanish Tickler, which made him look like a "vicious gay man".

Wooden Horse - This saw-horse shaped device had a pointed edge across that top. The victim was forced to "ride the horse" putting full body weight on the genitals. Used on both men and women. :shock:

Man Crashes Car; Watches Home Burn; Gets Ticket

ROCK ISLAND, Tenn. (AP) - One moment, Justin Hill was turning into his driveway. Minutes later he was being flown to a hospital as his home went up in flames. Then he got a traffic ticket.

Hill, 42, got into a crash after turning into the path of an oncoming car Tuesday evening, said Tennessee Highway Patrol Officer Monte Terry. Hill's wife heard the crash and ran outside, leaving the kitchen stove, where she had been cooking, unattended.

Within minutes, their Rock Island trailer was on fire, and firefighters who had responded to the accident found themselves fighting the blaze.

The rural central Tennessee home had extensive damage. Hill was treated at the hospital and released, but he was cited in the accident for failure to yield.

a bad day :?
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Post by MADMAX » Wed May 14, 2008 7:51 am

Man accused of handing pot to court security

CLEVELAND, Tenn. (AP) - A man was arrested after pulling marijuana from his pocket at a security check at a court. The man was visiting the courts section of the Bradley County Justice Center on Monday when he was asked to empty his pockets into a plastic bowl, a standard procedure.

Sheriff Tim Gobble said the items he placed in the bowl included marijuana and rolling papers. When questioned, the man ran from the building, but officers captured him within minutes.

The man faces charges of having contraband in a penal institution and evading arrest. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Darth Vader Attacks Jedi Church - Seriously

HOLYHEAD, Wales (AP) ― A man who dressed up as Darth Vader, wearing a garbage bag for a cape, and assaulted the founders of a group calling itself the Jedi church was given a suspended sentence Tuesday.

Arwel Wynne Hughes, 27, attacked Jedi church founder Barney Jones - aka Master Jonba Hehol - with a metal crutch, hitting him on the head, prosecutors told Holyhead Magistrates' Court.

He also whacked Jones' 18-year-old cousin, Michael Jones - known as Master Mormi Hehol - bruising his thigh in the March 25 incident, prosecutors said.

The two cousins and Barney Jones' brother, Daniel, set up the Church of Jediism, Anglesey order, last year. Jedi is the faith followed by some of the central characters in the "Star Wars" films.

The group, which claims about 30 members, says on its Web site that it uses "insight and knowledge" from the films as "a guide to living a better and more worthwhile life."

"We all love the films and what they stand for. Obviously some people are going to laugh about it," the Wales on Sunday newspaper quoted Barney Jones as saying last month. "But a lot of people do take it seriously."

Unfortunately for Hughes, his March attack was recorded on a video camera that the cousins had set up to film themselves in a light saber battle.

"Darth Vader! Jedis!" Hughes shouted as he approached.

Hughes claimed he couldn't remember the incident, having drunk the better part of a 2 1/2-gallon (10-liter) box of wine beforehand.

"He knows his behavior was wrong and didn't want it to happen but he has no recollection of it," said Hughes' lawyer, Frances Jones.

District Judge Andrew Shaw sentenced Hughes to two months in jail but suspended the sentence for one year. He also ordered Hughes to pay $195 to each of his victims and $117 in court costs.

In the 2001 United Kingdom census, 390,000 - 0.7 percent of the population - listed Jedi as their religion. :shock: :shock:



----- just an up date on the above jedi, they have a web page lol -----
http://www.jedichurch.com/jedi-ordination.html

€15 i can join and become a Jedi..... woot woot lolz
Jedi Name Generator

Cast off your old name! Your Jedi name is
MAXMA MASER of the planet HALEYS!
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Post by Archie_Klumper » Fri May 16, 2008 1:19 pm

Employee Robs Restaurant in Uniform :doh:

http://www.firstcoastnews.com/news/loca ... yid=109194

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Post by MADMAX » Fri May 16, 2008 1:26 pm

what an idiot lolololz
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Post by MADMAX » Fri May 16, 2008 1:27 pm

Goody Goody Girl Scout Sells 17,000 Cookies

DETROIT (AP) - A Girl Scout has financed her trip to Europe with Thin Mints, Samoas and Do-Si-Dos, possibly breaking a national record in the process. Jennifer Sharpe, a 15-year-old from Dearborn, sold 17,328 boxes of Girl Scout cookies this year, which shatters her troop's old record and is believed to be a national record, though Girl Scouts of the USA doesn't track individual sales.

"It's always been one of those goals I wanted to accomplish," Sharpe said Wednesday.

Michelle Tompkins, spokeswoman for New York-based Girl Scouts of the USA, called the feat "amazing" but said there's no national record on the books.

"We're thrilled for the girls who take it to such a great level, but so far, we don't track it at the national level," she said.

The two bakeries that make the cookies sold by Girl Scouts said Sharpe sold more than anyone this year, according to Dianne Thomas, spokeswoman for the Girl Scouts of Metro Detroit.

"They are aware when a council has a super seller," Thomas said.

Sharpe sold cookies every day on a street corner with help from her mother and troop leader, Pam Sharpe.

"We were always there, we never closed," Pam Sharpe said. "At one point, Jenny got really sick and we did shut down early, and we heard about it the next day."

Jennifer Sharpe's Troop 813 raised about $21,000 in cookie sales that will pay for its 10-day trip to Europe this winter.

It isn't the first time the troop has traveled using cookie money. A couple of years ago, the Scouts decided they wanted to take a Caribbean cruise

"They sold enough to be able to swim with the dolphins," Thomas said. "So after that, what do you do? Well, they said, 'Let's go to Europe.'"

In addition to vacation destinations, the cookie program also has helped push Jennifer out of her shell, Pam Sharpe said.

"It's made her really confident," she said. "I remember when she first started selling, she was very shy and quiet and you had to push her out to talk to customers, but now she's right out there, first to the door."

One thing that hasn't changed, despite selling thousands of boxes for the past few years, is Jennifer Sharpe's feelings about the cookies.

"I love them," she said.

Why You Are Fat

Put down those doughnuts fatty. It's time to listen up and stop being such a lardass. If any of the following situations applies to you then it's time to re-evaluate things, because girls don't like having sex with a human bean bag chair.


1) Ever since you read an article on the internet on tips to lose weight, you've started walking 2 flights of stairs to get to work instead of taking the elevator. Unfortunately, that is the only excersize you get all day.

2) For lunch you grab a Big Mac, Supersized Fries and another Big Mac on the side. It's ok though, you wash everything down with a Diet Coke.

3) You've bought the Magic Bullet and make a pretty mean Pizza, Milk and Fruit Smoothie.

4) On of your friends dared you to ride everywhere in a power scooter for a day. That was 4 years ago and you still are riding in a power scooter.

5) You tell people that you aren't fat....you're "big boned" or "it's glandular" or you're "pregnant". Denial is a terrible thing.

6) You were supposed to go to your grandma's funeral/court date/child's birth but ended up at a buffet instead. It was ok though, because in your mind a buffet is always the right place to be.

7) You keep telling yourself, "Why do I need a girlfriend? I can play with my own awesome tits."

8) A basket of 50 hot wings....that's just getting you warmed up.

9) Every meal you eat can and is eaten with a dip on the side.

If any of these situations applies to you, it's time to settle down or else you may find yourself on a TLC special.
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Post by Archie_Klumper » Tue May 20, 2008 11:42 am

Dang, it was purty cold in the state the past couple of days...

Pilot accused of naked romp in woods
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
The Associated Press

HARRISBURG -- An airline pilot was found hiding behind a shed wearing only flip-flops and a wristwatch as a nighttime romp in the woods with a flight attendant ended with both under arrest.

Jeffrey Paul Bradford, 24, of Moon in suburban Pittsburgh, and Adrianna Grace Connor, 24, both employees of Pinnacle Airlines Inc., were at a diner on the outskirts of Harrisburg on Sunday night before they apparently decided to walk into the woods, police said.

"They told the officer they wanted to go do it in the woods, essentially," said Lower Swatara Township Police Sgt. Richard Brandt. "That's the best answer they had."

The two somehow became separated, and people who live in the neighborhood summoned police around 9:30 p.m., saying they had seen a naked man and an intoxicated woman.

A helicopter with heat-seeking equipment was called in, and Mr. Bradford was discovered hiding behind a shed shortly before midnight.

His only attire was a pair of flip-flops and a wristwatch.

Mr. Bradford was charged with indecent exposure, public drunkenness and other offenses. Ms. Connor, of Belleville, Mich., was charged with theft from a motor vehicle, public drunkenness and other offenses; police said she took a flashlight from a neighbor's vehicle.

A spokesman for the Memphis, Tenn., airline said the two were suspended while the company investigates.

The Harrisburg Patriot-News reported that Mr. Bradford was scheduled for a flight at 7:30 a.m. yesterday.

Pinnacle forbids flight crews from taking a drink 12 hours before their next scheduled duty, the newspaper reported.

:eyebrow:

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Post by MADMAX » Tue May 20, 2008 12:29 pm

busted!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Computer Unlocks Secrets Of Dog Language

RUSALEM (AP) - Israeli jails are using a custom-built computer program to interpret the barks of guard dogs and distinguish warnings of a breakout from everyday woofs, a prisons official said Monday.

Noam Tavor, head of the Israel Prisons Service canine unit, said the program is designed to overcome mistakes in which guards have either not heard dogs sounding an alarm or failed to speedily identify its significance.

"It collects the dogs' barks through microphones...and sorts and grades them," Tavor told Army Radio. "It relays only the barks that are significant in terms of security - barks that reveal stress or aggression in the dog."

The radio said prison staff monitor the system through loudspeakers and TV cameras that automatically zoom in on suspected hot spots.

Because of their heightened sense of smell and hearing, dogs can identify suspicious people well before they trip an alarm wire, Tavor told The Associated Press Monday.

The Prison Service has long used dogs to patrol its fences, but found the system had flaws. "The dogs would bark, and staff of the prison wouldn't hear it, or would hear it and would not take action fast enough." Tavor said.

He said prison staff would also sometimes ignore dogs' barks if they thought it was nothing serious, what he called the "boy who cried wolf" phenomenon.

Six years ago, the Prisons Service joined with Bio-Sense, a high-tech company headquartered near Tel Aviv, to create a system that would notify them when dogs were barking because of something suspicious.

Bio-Sense recorded the patrol dogs barking in different situations, from playtime to cat encounters to real emergencies. They loaded thousands of these recordings into a computer program to determine "what makes the emergency bark different than the other barks," said Bio-Sense project manager Orit Netz.

One of the keys turned out to be the dog's stress level.

Bio-Sense developed a sensor that can determine a dog's stress based on the sound of its bark. The sensor can be placed within a 15 yard radius of the dog to detect the "emergency barks" and sound an alarm in the prison's control room.

According to Bio-Sense, they are the only ones to have developed this technology. "We don't have any competitors at the moment," Netz said.

The first system was put in place in 2005, and since then three more have been installed in Israeli prisons. Bio-Sense now has more than 100 clients in Israel, including farmers who need protection against theft, Netz said.

lol

Guns For Girls Becoming All The Rage

Guns, grenades and other weapons were typically designed for men, but now that women are more involved in combat, both in Hollywood and in real life, an influx of stylish weaponry has hit the market. While not all of the following stylish items are actually functional, all are inspired by weaponry. The gallery shows everything from Fendi machine guns to Versace riffles and pink grenades as well as more legal items like chic tasers and stun guns.
So ladies, get reader to channel your inner Lara Croft and get ready to kick ass in style with the following list of ultra deadly, girlie gear.

i 100% blame DUESY FOR THIS :D

here is the link check out the pics LOL
http://www.davesdaily.com/out.php?id=39 ... pons-women
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Post by Renegadex » Tue May 20, 2008 11:21 pm

i'm reminded of a Simpsons episode where they introduced an invtention that translated baby talk...or was it dogs? I dunno. It was funny. :lol:

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Re: IN THE NEWS

Post by Duesy » Tue May 20, 2008 11:51 pm

MADMAX wrote:
Guns For Girls Becoming All The Rage

Guns, grenades and other weapons were typically designed for men, but now that women are more involved in combat, both in Hollywood and in real life, an influx of stylish weaponry has hit the market. While not all of the following stylish items are actually functional, all are inspired by weaponry. The gallery shows everything from Fendi machine guns to Versace riffles and pink grenades as well as more legal items like chic tasers and stun guns.
So ladies, get reader to channel your inner Lara Croft and get ready to kick ass in style with the following list of ultra deadly, girlie gear.

i 100% blame DUESY FOR THIS :D

here is the link check out the pics LOL
http://www.davesdaily.com/out.php?id=39 ... pons-women
Honey, a girl has to be stylish.. at all times.. :cool:
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Post by MADMAX » Wed May 21, 2008 2:55 am

hahahah DUESY you ROCK :lol: :P
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Post by Archie_Klumper » Thu May 22, 2008 8:59 am

Man admits having sex with 1,000 cars
Last Updated: 1:23PM BST 21/05/2008

A man who claims to have had sex with 1,000 cars has defended his "romantic" feelings towards vehicles.

Edward Smith, who lives with his current "girlfriend" – a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla, insisted that he was not "sick" and had no desire to change his ways.

"I appreciate beauty and I go a little bit beyond appreciating the beauty of a car only to the point of what I feel is an expression of love," he said.

"Maybe I'm a little bit off the wall but when I see movies like Herbie and Knight Rider, where cars become loveable, huggable characters it's just wonderful.
Article continues
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"I'm a romantic. I write poetry about cars, I sing to them and talk to them just like a girlfriend. I know what's in my heart and I have no desire to change."

He added: "I'm not sick and I don't want to hurt anyone, cars are just my preference."

Mr Smith, 57, first had sex with a car at the age of 15, and claims he has never been attracted to women or men.

But his wandering eye has spread beyond cars to other vehicles. He says that his most intense sexual experience was "making love" to the helicopter from 1980s TV hit Airwolf.

As well as Vanilla, he regularly spends time with his other vehicles – a 1973 Opal GT, named Cinnamon, and 1993 Ford Ranger Splash, named Ginger.

Before Vanilla, he had a five-year relationship with Victoria, a 1969 VW Beetle he bought from a family of Jehovah's Witnesses.

But he confesses that many of the cars he has had sex with have belonged to strangers or car showrooms.

His last relationship with a woman was 12 years ago - and he could not bring himself to consummate it, although he did have sex with girls in his younger days.

Mr Smith, from Washington state in the US, kept quiet about his secret fetish for years, but agreed to be interviewed as part of a channel Five documentary into “mechaphilia”. He is shown meeting other enthusiasts at a rally in California

Talking about how his unusual passion developed, Mr Smith said: "It's something that grew as a part of me when I was a kid and I could not shake it.

"I just loved cute cars right from the beginning, but over the years it got stronger once I got into my teenage years and was my first having sexual urges.

"When I turned 13 and the famous Corvette Stingray came about, that car was pure sex and just an incredible machine. I wanted it.

"I didn't fully understand it myself except that I know I'm not hurting anyone and I do not intend to."

He added: "There are moments way out in the middle of nowhere when I see a little car parked and I swear it needs loving.

"There have been certain cars that attracted me and I would wait until night time, creep up to them and just hug and kiss them.

"As far as women go, they never really interested me much. And I'm not gay.”

Mr Smith is now part of a global community of more than 500 “car lovers” brought together by internet forums. :?

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Post by Duesy » Thu May 22, 2008 9:54 am

wow.. I dunno what's worse.. he finds a car more attractive than a woman... or he cheats on the car he's seeing, with 4 or 5 other cars..
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Post by Renegadex » Thu May 22, 2008 5:56 pm

That's...um...almost the strangest fetish I've ever heard of.

What, does he go for the gas tank inlet? :lol:

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Post by He||raZ'r » Thu May 22, 2008 6:00 pm

Renegadex wrote:That's...um...almost the strangest fetish I've ever heard of.

What, does he go for the gas tank inlet? :lol:

or the exhaust pipe
..Its merely a couple of clicks and BLAM , I'm instant smoke.

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Post by Renegadex » Thu May 22, 2008 8:19 pm

He||raZ'r wrote:
Renegadex wrote:That's...um...almost the strangest fetish I've ever heard of.

What, does he go for the gas tank inlet? :lol:

or the exhaust pipe


(queue scene of Axel Foley stuffing banana into tail pipe)

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Post by Xpress » Thu May 22, 2008 9:25 pm

From MSNBC -

Mexican donkey freed after acting like a jackass

TUXTLA GUTIERREZ, Mexico - A Mexican donkey has been freed from jail after doing time for acting like a jackass.

The Televisa network on Wednesday showed Blacky gobbling food from a bucket after spending three days in a jail that normally holds people for public drunkenness and other disturbances.

Blacky was jailed for biting and kicking two men near a ranch outside Tuxtla Gutierrez, the capital of the southern state of Chiapas.

Officials freed the donkey after its owner paid a fine of $36 and the $115 hospital bill of the men, who suffered bites to the chest and a broken ankle. Authorities say he also must pay $480 to each man for missed work days.

The victims said the donkey bit Genaro Vazquez, 63, in the chest on Sunday and then kicked 52-year-old Andres Hernandez as he tried to come to the rescue, fracturing his ankle.

"All of a sudden, the animal was on top of us like it was rabid," Hernandez said.

Police said it took a half-dozen men to control the enraged beast.

Chiapas police have thrown animals in the slammer before, including a bull that devoured corn crops and destroyed two wooden vending stands in March.

In 2006, a dog was locked up for 12 days after biting someone. His owners were fined $18.
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Post by He||raZ'r » Fri May 23, 2008 2:25 pm

Renegadex wrote:
He||raZ'r wrote:
Renegadex wrote:That's...um...almost the strangest fetish I've ever heard of.

What, does he go for the gas tank inlet? :lol:

or the exhaust pipe


(queue scene of Axel Foley stuffing banana into tail pipe)


LOL forgot about that. Good memory.


I think that Alex Foley was gay, what do u think?

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Post by Judge » Fri May 23, 2008 3:25 pm

$#!T Archie, I thought that I as the ONLY one that had heard about that! :shock:
PWN'N n00bs leik j0o!

I laff AT those that THINK they are good, and laff WITH those that ARE!

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Archie_Klumper
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Post by Archie_Klumper » Fri May 23, 2008 3:46 pm

:lol: I subscribe to the Fark.com RSS Feed. They have oodles of nonsense there.

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Renegadex
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Post by Renegadex » Fri May 23, 2008 5:11 pm

(queue scene of Axel Foley stuffing "banana" in "tailpipe")


Subtle

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MADMAX
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IN THE NEWS

Post by MADMAX » Mon May 26, 2008 8:52 am

Hostage released for pizza

An Australian prison guard held hostage for two days was released after a ransom demand for pizzas was met.

Up to 20 inmates at the Risdon Prison in Hobart, Tasmania, seized the guard in a protest over conditions in the maximum security jail.

Initially they made 24 demands to authorities, but eventually gave up their hostage after agreeing to 15 pizzas, Coke and garlic bread instead.

"At midnight, the final sticking point with the inmates was that they were requiring pizzas to be delivered. Our staff member was negotiated out with the delivery of 15 pizzas," Graeme Barber, Tasmania's director of prisons, told The Advocate newspaper.

The guard is recovering from his ordeal at home.

Granny rugby-tackled jay walker

77-year-old granny made a citizen's arrest in Germany when she rugby-tackled a 25-year-old jay walker.

The pensioner sat on him until police arrived - because he had walked across a road before the light was green.

The woman, from Freital, near Dresden, shouted at the man as he crossed the road before the little green man flashed up.

The old lady said she became even angrier when he hit her with his rucksack as he pushed past her when he reached the other side of the road.

She grabbed his hair and managed to wrestle him to the ground where she sat on him until police, who had been called by a passer-by, came.

He was taken to a local police station where he was fined for jay walking.

:P
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Duesy
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Re: IN THE NEWS

Post by Duesy » Mon May 26, 2008 10:49 am

MADMAX wrote:
The guard is recovering from his ordeal at home.


:P
with pizza, coke and a piece of garlic bread?
"There are 10 types of people in this world. Those who understand binary and those who don't"
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